


All Will Be Alright

by munshayne



Series: KuroTsuki Week 2020 [11]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst and Drama, Drama & Romance, Forgiveness, KuroTsuki Week 2020, Kuroo Tetsurou Being an Asshole, M/M, Making Love, Mistakes, Smut, Songfic, Tsukishima Kei being forgiving, kurotsuki - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:34:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25665238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/munshayne/pseuds/munshayne
Summary: KuroTsuki Week 2020!! Day 11: SongficI am not an experienced writer therefore I'm sorry for grammatical errors and repetitive words/phrases.Inspired by this song,Leaves by Ben&Ben
Relationships: Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei
Series: KuroTsuki Week 2020 [11]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1844272
Kudos: 53





	All Will Be Alright

**Author's Note:**

> KuroTsuki Week 2020!! Day 11: Songfic
> 
> I am not an experienced writer therefore I'm sorry for grammatical errors and repetitive words/phrases.
> 
> Inspired by this song, [ Leaves by Ben&Ben ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hCd1nAI-po4)

“There you go again. Doing things that he should be doing.”

Kei raised his head and gave Akaashi a small smile before continuing the project that Kuroo’s supposed to turn in tomorrow. He ignored his best friend’s ranting about how he should just stop chasing Kuroo and that he’s an asshole and stuff.

Almost everyday, Akaashi reminds him that he’s worth it and shouldn’t be treated like shit but Kei doesn’t listen because he’s too blinded by love. Even if Akaashi says all Kuroo’s imperfection, mistakes, and the bad things that he’s been doing to him, Kuroo is still perfect in Kei's eyes.

“You know what, I’m done for the night. I can’t stand you, I can’t stand this. I just hope one day you’ll realize and see that you deserve better. Stop lowering your god damn pride every time please? It makes you look pathetic. Good night.” Akaashi said, then went to his bed, tucking himself in.

Kei murmured a small good night and focused his attention on the project once again. _This is my choice_ , Kei thought to himself. He chose to do this. 

It was way past midnight when he finished the project. The blonde smiled to himself looking satisfied. He got up and stretched his body before quietly going out of their room. He kept yawning while going to the 4th floor where Kuroo was.

“Kuroo-san, it’s me Kei.” He knocked three times and fixed his shirt, waiting for Kuroo to open up. He knows the raven is still awake because he mostly sleeps at 1 or 2 am in the morning.

Kei smiled as the door opened but it immediately vanished when he saw Kuroo with no shirt and hickeys all over his body and half naked man on the bed. He swallowed his saliva together with his own pride and smiled once again.

“Here! It’s done. Sorry for the delay.” Kei exclaimed and gave Kuroo his project.

“Thanks baby, you’re the best.” Kuroo replied then winked at him while taking the papers from his hand. The blonde felt disappointed when Kuroo was about to close the door so he called his name.

“Yes?” Kuroo asked with a grin on his face. Kei smiled and shook his head before saying, “Make sure not to get caught. Have a good night!” 

Kei didn’t return to their room right away and went outside instead. He bought a drink from the vending machine and sat down on the nearby bench. He looked at the stars and a sigh escaped from his lips.

He didn’t know when this started. He didn’t know when he started lowering his pride for one man. He was never the type of person who’ll let anyone get past the walls that he built until he met Kuroo Tetsurou.

It was love at first sight. A thing that he never imagined he’ll ever experience. He first saw Kuroo during their first year orientation in college. The raven was one of the people who toured them around the campus and explained the rules.

Kuroo was very kind to him. At least he thought he’s nice only towards him but the truth is he’s nice to everyone else. Kei never felt that way to any person before , it was all new to him. Him being naive, confessed his feelings a few weeks after meeting him.

He was rejected. Kuroo said friendship is the only thing that he can offer but Kei didn’t back down and said he’ll do anything to make him fall for him so he stayed by his side. At first, it was all Kei ever wanted.

Being by his side, studying with him, and eating with him. But all of that didn’t last long when he found out Kuroo’s attitude through Akaashi, his roommate. It turns out Kei was not the only one he treated that way.

For the past three years Kuroo was in college, he’ll lead someone on and use them. Whether it’s a girl or it’s a boy. Then he’ll push them away when he’s done playing with them. Akaashi warned him to stop but unfortunately, he didn’t listen.

He wanted to keep doing it even if Kuroo used him, abuse his kindness. He let him do it because he likes him.. No, he loves him. He did everything Kuroo wanted to do, make lunch, make his assignments or project, iron his clothes or even buy condoms and lube because he’s doing it with someone that night.

Kei did it all.

Of course, it hurts that he cries every night but what can he do? He’s afraid once he’ll stop he’ll never talk with Kuroo again and he doesn’t want that. Even if it means, he’ll get played and used every time.

“How many times did you cry every night because of him?” Akaashi said while looking at his notes where he apparently listed the times Kei cried at night.

“Akaashi-san, please-” 

Before Kei could defend Kuroo, the topic of the conversation was seen from afar, waving at the blonde. Kei’s lips turned into a smile as the raven jogged to him and pulled him into a hug.

“Thank you for that. My professor praised me! I got a high grade thanks to you.” Kuroo said with his hands on Kei's elbow.

“It's nothing! I'm glad it turned out well. Are you free tonight? Let's celebrate.” Kei asked even though he knew he's gonna get turned down.

“I'm sorry I have plans for the night. Maybe some other time!” Kuroo said before excusing himself, leaving the two. Akaashi gave an ‘ _are-you-kidding-me_ ’ look at Kei but the blonde just smiled.

“Who would go so far to learn the lesson of a 3rd Year Student when you're literally a 1st Year? God damn it. My day was ruined when I saw him bye. I'll see you later.” Akaashi said before tapping his shoulder. 

Kei encouraged himself and took a deep breath before going to his class. Time went by fast for him. He usually drowns himself in school works because he feels like something's wrong if he's not doing anything or if he's relaxed. 

In the middle of studying for his quiz tomorrow, he received a text from Kuroo. 

_ [08/01/2020, 9:21 PM] Kuroo Tetsurou: Heajello Keiiiieee _

_ [08/01/2020, 9:21 PM] Tsukishima Kei: Kuroo-san, are you drunk? _

_ [08/01/2020, 9:24 PM] Kuroo Tetsurou: Nopsh hehehwh3r _

_ [08/01/2020, 9:24 PM] Tsukishima Kei: Where are you? I'll go there.  _

After minutes of asking the raven his proper location, Kei stormed out of their room. Akaashi tried to stop him but he failed. He always fails to stop Kei when it comes to Kuroo. 

When he arrived at the bar, he scrunched his nose when the scent of different booze welcomed him. He looked around, trying to find Kuroo. He flinches every time someone touches his butt or his waist.

He would never get used to this kind of place. He finally saw Kuroo making out with a girl in the corner. Kei took a deep breath, mentally and emotionally preparing himself before walking towards them.

“Kuroo-san.” Kei called which broke their kiss. The girl glared at him but he paid no attention to her.

“A-ah! My Kei is here hehe.” Kuroo laughed. The blonde sighed before gently grabbing the raven's arm, pulling him up.

“Can't you see we're doing something here!? Go find your own dick or something.” The girl said but Kei ignored her which pissed her off even more. The girl was about to attack Kei but Kuroo pushed him harshly. 

“Don't! Lay a hand on him! He's.. mine.” Kuroo said before getting out of balance and luckily, Kei caught him in his arms.

It took them a long time until they got out of the bar. Kuroo was heavy but the blonde didn't mind and tried his best to escort the raven.

“K-kei… so nice hehe.” Kuroo said while poking the blonde's cheeks. Kei gave him a small smile and they kept walking. 

Kei was caught off guard when Kuroo suddenly pulled him into an alley and kissed him. The blonde kissed back with a frown on his face as he tasted beer on Kuroo's lips. 

Kuroo's hands find its way to Kei's pants groping his ass which made the blonde flinch. 

“K-kuroo-san.. n-not here.” Kei said while trying to push him away. The raven's hands kept roaming around his body until he suddenly passed out.

Kei mentally slapped himself as he held Kuroo. It was not the first time that this happened and he failed to push him away every time because the kiss felt good and Kei liked Kuroo's big and warm hands on his body.

“For Pete's sake, when are you going to stop Kei!?” Akaashi shouted. Kei just told him what happened yesterday night and even though he knew Akaashi would get mad, he still told him because he doesn't want to hide anything from him. 

“I.. can't.” Kei answered, defeated.

“You can! You can stop but you don't want to! You're worth more than that! Stop lowering your worth just for one man when there's literally better guys out there that can treat you better! Stop begging for love from the wrong man Kei. I can't handle seeing you like that anymore. It's been almost 7 months Kei. Stop it please.” 

Akaashi messed his hair when he saw Kei crying and shaking his head. He doesn't know anymore what to say to make him stop. 

“End all things with him before this week ends Kei. End it all.” 

Despite thinking hard… Kei could not do it. He can't leave Kuroo. He knows he's the most pathetic person in the world. Every time he'll try to leave him, all the memories that they shared will always flash into his mind and in the end he'll back down.

He picked up his phone when it lit up and he saw a message from Kuroo. Telling him to buy something at the mall. But Kei was not feeling well. 

He's burning up, stuck on his bed. For the first time, Kei declined Kuroo's request and went back to sleep. He's not feeling well and him meeting with Kuroo will not help at all. 

“Here.” Akaashi said then gave Kei medicine. The blonde took it and drank some water before thanking his roommate.

Kei grabbed his phone to check if there's any message from Kuroo but there's none. It's past 10pm and the blonde hopes he's safe and sound. Akaashi grabbed his phone and turned it off, telling Kei to not worry about anything and just focus on getting better. 

After a few days, Kei was finally feeling better and was able to attend his class. On his way to his room he saw Kuroo. He smiled and waved at him but the raven stared coldly and walked towards the other direction.

Kei's smile faded as his hands slowly fell down. He was worried if he did something that would make the raven mad and he wasn't able to focus on his lectures. 

When his classes ended, he packed his things and hurriedly looked for Kuroo. He was typing a message to him when someone suddenly called his name.

“Ushijima-san?” Kei stopped and faced the latter. 

“Hello Tsukishima. I was wondering if you have free time?” The senior asked. The blonde looked at his clock and nodded.

“I was wondering if you can be one of my models on my upcoming portfolio? It's okay if you decline, no worries.” Ushijima said which made Kei shocked.

“Me!? As in me? Me as your model? B-but why I mean..” Kei asked, confused on why he was chosen. 

“You may not notice it but a lot of people admire your beauty. I can name a lot of guys and girls that like you. And you seem photogenic so wanna give it a try?” 

Kei was about to reply but then he saw Kuroo, looking at them. The raven quickly walked to the other direction which made Kei panic.

“I'm sorry I need to go! I.. I'll text you my answer. I'm really sorry.” Kei said before running to Kuroo, calling his name. 

He kept calling his name but the raven wouldn't stop and just kept walking faster. 

“Kuroo-san!” Kei said then grabbed his arm which he quickly pulled away. He panted for air as his heart started beating faster. The raven looks real mad and he doesn't know what to do. This was the first time this happened. 

“W-what's wrong? Is everything okay?” Kei asked, worried.

“You know you could have said you don't like me anymore before you flirt with other guys right?” 

“What are you… saying?” 

“What did you get tired of me? Is that why you declined my request the other day huh? Because you found someone else? Is that it? Bullshit you could have informed me.”

Kei's hand moved faster than his mind and slapped him. His eyes widened, shocked by what he did as well.

“N-no.. I'm.. sor-”

“Forget it. Don't approach me ever again. Don't act like you know me. We're done here. Good bye.” 

His knees weakened and he fell to the ground. He felt his heart being torn into pieces. He wanted to follow him, to stop him from leaving… but he's tired. He's just so damn tired of chasing him every time. 

_You're the one who pushed him away but then why are you the one hurting?_ That's the question circling on Kuroo's mind for the past few days. 

He pushed away the girl who's been kissing his jaw for a while now. 

“Get out.”

“What?!”

“I said get out!” Kuroo shouted. The girl rolled his eyes before leaving the room. The raven buried his face on his palm before falling to his bed. 

These past few days have been shit for him. He got used to having his lunch prepared. He got used to his projects and assignments getting done. He got used to having reviewers and well written notes. He got used to having clean and ironed clothes. He got used to having someone pick him up when he gets drunk. He got used to having someone who cheers him up when he's sad or fucked up. 

He got used to having Kei by his side.

No…

He got used to having Kei do things for him.

_But it's not my fault,_ his goddamn pride whispers to him every time. The door opened and Bokuto came in.

“What happened? This is rare.” His roommate said while taking off his ID. Bokuto will always go to their room late if he knows Kuroo will bring someone there tonight. 

“Not in the mood.” Kuroo answered and buried his face on his pillow. 

Bokuto changed into his usual clothes and sat on his bed before looking at the raven. 

“I guess that's your karma huh.” What Bokuto said made Kuroo get up from his bed, glaring at him.

“What? Man you abused his kindness. Kind of glad you said that to him and he stopped because he deserves more than that. You suck. You're a piece of shit. That's why my boyfriend hates you for doing that to his best friend. Good night asshole. Keep regretting.” Bokuto stated before lying down on his bed.

“What is it entirely my fault!? He's in the wrong too!” Kuroo defended himself but his roommate ignored him and just said good night. 

The raven left early the next morning because he'll just get pissed if he talks to Bokuto. He sat down on the bench and took some cigarette on his hands, his habit if he feels like shit. 

Kuroo threw the cigarette on the ground before he can even light it up when he remembered something. 

“You smoke? That's bad for your health.” Kei said and tried to take the cigarette from Kuroo's hand but the raven dodged.

“Not all the time. Just when I feel stressed or shit or I don't know.” Kuroo explained. His mouth went open when Kei still grabbed the cigarette on his hand.

“Then, I'll make sure you feel better all the time so you won't feel like shit. I'll help you with your schoolworks so you won't get stressed. Then, you won't take this anymore? Deal?” 

Kuroo messed his hair and let out a groan. Everything reminds him of Kei and he hates it. He pulled back his head and stared blankly at the sky. 

“It's not my fault. Yeah, it's not. I lived without him before. I can do it this time as well. I can find another one like him. Yeah.. that's it.” 

That's what he said. That's what he thought but he thought wrong. He will never find someone like Tsukishima Kei. He will never find someone who's willing to do the things that Kei has done. He will never find someone who's willing to stay with him even if he's being used. It's only… Kei 

To say Kuroo was miserable was understatement, it was deeper than that. His scores in assignments and quizzes went down because no one took notes for him anymore. He barely eats in time because there's no one to remind him to eat anymore. He wears crumpled and messy clothes because no one's there to tidy it up anymore. He feels like shit and no one's there to cheer him up anymore.

Despite what he did.. some part of him was still hoping that Kei would come back to him, smiling. Like he always do 

“Fix yourself. Don't expect him to come back to you after everything that you did. He's a human. He gets tired, Kuroo. Fix yourself before everyone leaves you. Bye.” Bokuto said before leaving their room. 

Kuroo forced himself to get up from his bed. With little energy, he managed to take a shower and put on his crumpled clothes.  He had no energy to greet the people who greeted him. His eyes stayed on the ground as he walked towards his classroom 

He stopped on his tracks when he saw a familiar figure from a far. It was Kei and Ushijima. Kuroo felt a sharp pain on his heart when he saw Kei smile… He's smiling because of someone else. He smiled for someone else. 

Kuroo's feet were quick to act but before he could approach Kei someone grabbed his collar and dragged him away. 

“A-akaashi?” Kuroo called. Akaashi was shooting daggers at him which sent shivers down his spine. He's not mad.. he's furious. 

“Did you just attempt to approach Kei? Wow. After everything you've done? After you treated him like shit? After you used him? After you abused his kindness? Really? Do you have no respect for others and respect for yourself? Wow, you're that low.” Akaashi sarcastically laughed.

“Are you.. blaming me?” 

Akaashi laughed even more when that question slipped out of Kuroo's mouth. 

“Who should I blame? Kei? What an asshole.” 

“Don't talk like that about me when you know nothing! I was used in the past before! I was played before too! I experienced the same pain too! Don't act like you know everything!”

“Just because people hurted you in the past doesn't give you the right to hurt other people, Kuroo-san. You know how much it hurts getting used, getting played. But yet you still did that to everyone. You still did that to Kei. Kuroo-san… you're right. Not everything is your fault because you're both wrong. You used him and Kei let himself get used. Because he… he loves you. You're the first person that he loved Kuroo-san… but you're also the first person who wrecked his heart to pieces. Leave him alone.”

“He didn't do what I told him to do! I needed that for my subject but he declined and the first thing I saw was him with Ushijima!?”

“For fucks sake what are you, 5 years old!? Kuroo-san you're 2 years older than Kei! Yet Kei took time to learn your lessons to help you in your schoolworks! He learned 3rd Year's lesson even if he's just a first year! Kei never complained all this time and just because he didn't do it once you'll throw a fit?? He was sick! He was fucking sick that's why he declined that request of yours! He's with Ushijima-san because they're talking about school matters okay!? You said I shouldn't act like I know you… I could say the same for you. Don't act like you know Kei… Do you even know something about Kei?” 

Kuroo's eyes widened and fell silent when Akaashi said that. In his mind, he tried to remember the things that Kei like or his hobbies or anything about him… But he knows nothing yet Kei knows everything about him.

“Exactly… You know nothing. Now please. I'm begging, for the love of God…. Leave my Kei alone. Stop whatever is your relationship with him.”

You never really know someone's value until you lose them.

Kuroo finally realized what that meant. He expected Kei to stay by his side all the time. He expected that Kei would come back to him like nothing happened.

He was foolish. 

He's an asshole for not seeing Kei's worth. He's an asshole for using Kei like that. He's an asshole for treating Kei like that. He's an asshole for shouting Kei like that without knowing his side of the story. He's an asshole… who just realized he had feelings for Kei not that he's gone.

He finally realized that. 

“Kuroo, I don't know what's happening to you right now but you're failing almost all of your subjects. You'll never move to the 4th Year if you keep this up. Please, do better.” 

Kuroo was not able to say anything instead of sorry. He said sorry multiple times and promised to do better in the future. 

It's been a month since then. Kuroo's a wreck and Kei seems fine without him. The raven was glad though. He's happy seeing Kei fine. That's enough for him. 

Kuroo was lost in thought while walking to nowhere. He bumped into someone and murmured sorry but his eyes met a familiar one. Those eyes that looked at him with resentment one month ago.

Akaashi was about to say something when Kuroo bowed slightly and left quietly, not starting up a commotion. His feet dragged him to the library and sat down on the farthest table.

He's going to get better. He wants to be better for himself… and for Kei. 

He drowned himself in school work, trying to get his grades back up. He knows he's not that dumb, he was just relying on Kei all the time. But now he got no one to rely on. 

The reviewers and papers that Kei did really helped him a lot. He goes back to it from time to time and he took notes the same way Kei took it. 

Kuroo raised his head when a plastic bag was placed in front of him, eyes meeting Bokuto. 

“Eat. Take a break from time to time.” Bokuto said and went to the mirror to fix his clothes.

“Y-yeah, thank you.” Kuroo said and went back to scanning his books. It was the first time that they've spoken to each other since that day and Kuroo was fine with it. He deserves that kind of treatment so it's okay. 

The few minutes of postponing his lunch turned into hours and the next thing he knew it's almost 9 o'clock. Kuroo put down his ballpen and massaged his temple. 

He looked around their room, papers scattered everywhere. He has to clean it before Bokuto comes. His eyes landed on the food that his roommate brought him, his favorite food, untouched. 

Instead of eating, he grabbed a piece of scratch and tried to list something. The things that Kei like. 

After a few minutes of thinking, he buried his face on his palms as he looked at the list. 

  1. He likes me (maybe not anymore)
  2. He likes sweets.



That's all. Kuroo messed his hair before crumpling the paper and threw it somewhere in the room. He started bumping his head on the table, cursing himself. 

He raised his head lazily when he heard someone knocking on the door. He stood up and walked towards the door, stepping on some papers.

“Yes-” 

Kuroo's eyes widened as his heart started beating faster. There outside their room, stood Kei. The Kei that used to chase him all the time. That beautiful Kei. He looks even more glowing, now that I'm out of his life, Kuroo thought. 

“Y-yes? Bokuto's not.. here.” Kuroo gulped. There was no way the blonde would go to their room to see him. No, he wouldn't after he treated him that way. 

“I.. came here for you, Kuroo-san.” 

Kuroo didn't know what to feel, should he be happy or should he feel worried or should he feel excited. He didn't know. The loud pumping of his heart makes him nervous because he's afraid Kei will hear it. 

“O-oh.. Me. Oh, then.. Come in.” 

The raven just remembered that their room was a mess when he turned around. He quickly picked up the papers on the floor and threw the crumpled papers on the trash bin. 

Kei was about to pick up the crumpled paper near him when Kuroo realized that's where he wrote down the things that Kei liked.

“NO!” Kuroo said and almost tripped, grabbing the piece of paper away and tearing it to pieces. 

“S-sorry! The room's a mess. Yeah, haha. Sorry.” Kuroo explained, wiping his sweaty hands on his shirt. 

Silence then followed after that. They're just there, standing a few meters away from each other. The ringing of Kuroo's broke the uncomfortable silence and the raven thanked the caller in his mind. He's still not ready to hear what Kei has to say to him.

“Sorry once again. I'll just answer this. Yes, Kiyoko?” Kuroo turned his body to the other said while talking to his classmate. Kei just stood there, staring at him, listening to their conversation a little.

“Oh that? Wait i think it's with me.” Kuroo said before messing the pile of paper on his table, trying to find the paper that his classmate needed.

He stopped when Kei handed him a paper. The paper that he exactly needed. Kei knows more about his subject than him. Kuroo gave him a small smile before whispering thank you and getting back on the call. 

“Sorry about that. You can sit on the chair, oh wait you can sit on my bed or on the chair. I mean— Anywhere. Yeah.” Kuroo said as the call ended, he avoided Kei's gaze because he was just too nervous to look at him. 

He didn't know why Kei went to him. It made him overthink things. What if he's here to shout or scream or yell at him? What if he's here to get revenge on him? What if he's here to completely remove him from his life?

No matter what Kei was going to say, Kuroo will accept it. 

“How are you?” Kei asked as he sat down beside Kuroo, on his bed. The raven moved a little away from him to give him space. 

“I'm umm fine. Yeah. Just doing schoolworks here and there. How about you?” Kuroo replied and looked at Kei.

“I'm good as well.” 

A deafening silence enveloped the room. No one dared to start the conversation. Where should they start anyway? Or is there anything to talk about or is it better for things to be left unsaid? Kuroo mastered up the courage then talked. 

“I'm sorry… for everything.” Kuroo said, his eyes on the floor. He can feel the blonde's eyes on him but he stayed silent so Kuroo took it as a sign to keep talking. 

“I'm an asshole. I know that now. It's funny huh? I should have known that since the beginning. I'm sorry for using you.. I'm sorry for abusing your kindness… I'm sorry for all the unacceptable things that I've done.”

“Believe me or not, I'm not really like this before. I guess it started after I graduated high school. I got used by my first girlfriend because I have money and I'm popular. Since that day, I thought that people would only approach me for those things. So I told myself, before people can use me. I'm gonna use them. Bullshit right? Yeah, I know.” 

“But Akaashi said that just because I've been hurt by others doesn't give me the right to hurt others as well. And he's right. I.. I was wrong. For treating you that way. I was wrong for treating a sweet, a caring and a loving man like shit. I understand if you don't forgive me because you… you deserve so much better. A man who'll treat you right. Not me. Not a man who'll have sex with anyone and will make you buy condoms and lube when he knows you like him. Maybe someone like Ushijima? Someone who can make you smile that way. You deserve so much better. I'm… really, really sorry.” 

“Then why don't you get better? No… Aren't you getting better?” 

Kuroo finally looked at Kei's eyes, his eyebrows furrowed. His hands started to shake lightly as he tried to find words to say. 

“Do you know why I keep smiling all the time I'm with Ushijima-san? Because we were talking about you. That way I can genuinely smile in front of his camera, Kuroo-san. I modeled for him while thinking about you. I tried my best not to call or text you because Akaashi said so but believe me... I tried so many time to approach, text or call you because I miss you so much and I... I just want to hear one thing from you.. Do you miss me? Just say it and I'll come back.” Kei's voice cracked at the end which shattered Kuroo's heart. Tears forming on their eyes, their gaze not tearing away from each other. 

“I… can't.” Kuroo whispered. His fist was too closed that knuckles turned white and he can feel the pain of his nails digging on his skin but he didn't mind. 

“I forgive you Kuroo-san. Believe me, I really do forgive you. So please… just say it.”

Kuroo shook his head multiple times. 

“No Kei. Don't. Don't forgive me. I don't deserve your forgiveness. I don't deserve to say those words because I don't have the right to. Because I pushed you away. I judged you quickly without hearing your story. I… I did so many things. No… Don't come back… to me.” Kuroo said then gulped.

He missed Kei. He missed him so bad. He wanted to pull him into his arms and say sorry endlessly. He wants to wipe away the tears slowly running down his cheeks. He wants to hold him. 

But he can't.

“You're the first person that I l-like. To be honest I don't know if I can like someone else. Sure, it h-hurts. It hurted me when you're treating me that way. But… it will hurt me more if I don't have you by my side.. that's why it's okay. I forgive you. S-so… please.” Kei cried. 

“I… I miss you, Kei.” 

Kei didn't waste any second and jumped into his arms. Kuroo wrapped his arms around Kei's body and buried himself in his neck, crying. 

“I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.” Kuroo whispered multiple times as tears rolled down their faces. 

Kuroo knows he doesn't deserve Kei's forgiveness. He can't undo the things that he had done. But he can get better. He will be a better man for Kei. 

The raven pulled back and cupped Kei's warm cheeks. He wiped away the tears on his face and planted a soft kiss on his forehead. 

Their faces were inches apart from each other, feeling each other's breath on their skin, sending shivers to their spine. Kuroo was hesitant to close the distance. 

He was busy thinking whether he should kiss him or not when Kei pressed his lips against him. The blonde pulled away and looked at Kuroo's eyes saying… it's okay. 

Kuroo grabbed the back of Kei's head and pulled him into a kiss. The kiss was not too rough but not too soft either. They put all of their emotions as they swirl their tongue against each other and explore their mouths.

Their body slowly collapsed on the bed, Kuroo on top of Kei. The blonde stiffened when Kuroo's hands went under his shirt but then relaxed. Kei's arms tightly wrapped around Kuroo's neck, afraid that he'll leave. 

“What's wrong?” Kei asked softly when the raven stopped kissing and touching his body. Uneasiness was on Kuroo's eyes when he remembered the times he got drunk and touch Kei. 

“I.. I kept remembering everything. I'm afraid. I.. I don't want to hurt you.” Kuroo shakily said.

“But it was consensual isn't it? You initiated but I wanted it. So.. it's okay.”

“But still I-” 

Kuroo was silenced when Kei kissed him softly, gently. The blonde pulled away and caressed Kuroo's face.

“It's okay… so come to me, Tetsurou.” 

It's not the first time someone called him by his given name but when it came from Kei's mouth, it sounded so beautiful that it brought butterflies to his stomach. 

They kissed and touched each other gently, afraid to hurt each other. Kei feels so loved as Kuroo's hands roamed around his body… It feels like home. 

It didn't take too long ‘till they're half naked already. Kei closed his eyes as Kuroo kissed every part of his body. From his lips, to his jaw, to his chest, to his nipples. The blonde arched his back as he felt Kuroo sucking his nipples.

“A-ah, tetsu—” Kei moaned. 

Kuroo gets more aroused as Kei keeps calling his name in a loving way. Slowly, he moved down to his stomach, kissing it as he moved down until he reached his pants. 

They looked at each other with love and lust in their eyes as Kuroo slowly pulled down Kei's pants, together with his underwear. 

Kei closed his legs suddenly feeling conscious by Kuroo's stare. The raven moved up and kissed Kei's lips.

“You're so beautiful.” Kuroo whispered huskily as his hands slowly pulled Kei's legs apart. A moan escaped the blonde's lips when Kuroo sucked his inner thighs, leaving bite marks.

“T-tetsurou.. please.. I..” Kei panted, wanting Kuroo to touch him there. The blonde arched his back as he moaned when Kuroo suddenly took his length in his mouth. 

Kuroo bobs his head up and down, his hands on Kei's waist. Kei's hands went to his mouth to tone down his moans but the raven stopped him. 

“Let me hear you.” 

Kei feels more aroused as Kuroo made eye contact with him while sucking him off. The blonde let out a louder moan when Kuroo dipped his tongue into the slit. 

“Tetsurou!” Kei cried out. Kuroo's tongue was long and soft, wrapping it around Kei's length. The blonde was breathing heavily as he feel himself slowly dissolving to the pleasure 

But before he could cum Kuroo pulled away and licked his lips, leaving his cock hit and swollen with pre-cum coming out. 

“P-please.. Tetsu.” Kei begged. Kuroo grabbed the lube from his desk and put some of it on his fingers. 

“N-no, I want you… You Tetsurou please.” Kei cried and the raven placed a kiss on his forehead. 

“I know baby. But I don't want to hurt you again. Bare with it, just a little longer.” Kuroo hissed when Kei pressed his leg on his hard on. 

He was trying his best to hold back despite wanting to be in Kei already and make love to him over and over. 

“A-ahh!” Kei stuttered when Kuroo inserted one finger. He kept making noises he couldn't believe he could make as Kuroo's finger went back and forth. He arched his back when Kuroo inserted another one, stretching him out. 

“T-tetsurou… Please fuck me.” Kei rasped. Kuroo pulled out his fingers as he removed his boxers. 

The raven's cock twitched when he saw Kei staring hungrily at his length. A small smile escaped his lips and pulled Kei into a kiss. He was about to rip the condom open when Kei’s hand stopped him.

“Don’t... “ Kei whispered and gently touched Kuroo’s cock which made the raven gulp. The blonde was really testing his patience but in the end, he obliged and threw the condom away, quickly squeezing out the bottle of lube.

“I'm putting it in. Tell me if it hurts, I'll stop.” Kuroo said and planted a kiss on Kei's temple before positioning his cock on the blonde's hole.

Tears fell down on Kei's eyes as he screamed when Kuroo entered him. Kuroo immediately kissed Kei's tears away whispering comforting words and praises. The raven stays still, wanting Keii to adjust. 

“I love you, Kei.” 

The blonde's eyes widened and more tears came out. He cried out as he wrapped his arms around Kuroo's neck, pressing their foreheads together. 

“I love you… Tetsurou.” 

They sealed it with a kiss as Kuroo started thrusting slowly, his hands going up and down on Kei’s back. It was painful at first but it was immediately replaced by immeasurable pleasure. Kei knows the raven was good at this and Kuroo did not disappoint.

Kei was overwhelmed by the pleasure that he was feeling as Kuroo kept thrusting, going faster and harder every second. He dug his nails on Kuroo’s back that will surely leave a mark in the morning. The blonde rolled his eyes back into their head as saliva dripped from his mouth.

Skin slapping, Kei’s moans, Kuroo’s groans and their I Love You’s filled the whole room. Kuroo placed one of Kei’s legs on his shoulder as he thrusted hard which made a mess out of the blonde. He arched his back as he held into the sheets. 

“It feels _ah_ so good! Tetsurou!” 

They can hear the bed creaked as Kuroo keeps pouring all his love to every thrust that he makes. Kuroo was happy to see Kei clinging to him like his life depends on it. He’s happy hearing Kei moans his name loudly. He’s happy hearing Kei make noises that only he can hear. He made him like this and he was so happy. 

It didn’t take too long before Kei moaned loudly once again as he cum. He fell back on the bed, panting for air. 

“T-tetsurou!” Kei cried out when Kuroo kept thrusting. The raven hasn’t cum yet and Kei feels hypersensitive because he just came. The blonde was sobbing loudly, drowning in pleasure. 

A loud moan escaped their lips as Kuroo came and Kei felt the raven’s cum, filling him up. Kuroo collapsed on Kei’s body and kissed his temple, praising him for doing a good job. 

There were no more lonely days for the both of them because now they have each other on their arms. It wasn’t easy for them to get that point. It was never easy to love someone.

If you want to love someone, you must be prepared to get hurt because it’s not just all love. It’s not happiness all the time. You’ll get hurt in the process. You’ll make mistakes in the process. And what’s important is to learn from all of that.

There’s no perfect partner. There’s no perfect couple.

All of us make mistakes, sometimes the unforgivable one. But despite all of that, some people will always forgive us. No matter how much pain we inflicted on them. And that’s the case for Kei and Kuroo.

Kuroo will regret hurting and treating Kei that way for the rest of his life. And Kei will be there to tell him that it’s okay. They have a rough start but all will be alright in time and the wounds they inflicted on each other will eventually heal. There’s no guarantee that they won’t hurt each other in the future again, but the both of them knew in the end they’ll try to make everything right.

Sure, some people will judge Kei for still forgiving and loving Kuroo despite what he did. But Kei continues to believe that, you never really love someone until you learn to forgive.

So he did. 

**Author's Note:**

> And this fic concludes my KuroTsuki Week 2020 Series!! Thank you for reading my works despite me being an amateur! 
> 
> I didn't really planned this fic to be this long. There's supposed to be no smut but ehhh hehe <33
> 
> Once again, thank you so much!! You can find my other works if you click on my series <3 See you next time!!


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